Crystalkillz's Blog

My journey fighting the demon


April 2014

4/29/2014 @ 7:58pm

Ok, yes I do know why I got clean. My boyfriend dumped me and I fucking REFUSE to let him see me do worse and think he was so good. Because he wasn’t. Any man that calls a woman a bitch is not man in my book. And certainly not a man worth me.


4/29/2014 @ 6:10pm

I have been clean since 4/22/2014. Nothing…no meth, no pills, no alcohol.

Not sure why I am. I am happy tho. Yesterday was the first day I got out of bed since Tuesday of last week. Today I decided to change my phone number….too much temptation.

Will keep you updated …..

Some strange criticism: Why do I write this blog? (Again)



Why do I always think one more time…and then fuck that up?!

I am a lost cause when it comes to meth.

Not sure why or what I even care about –besides my children…no doubt EVER about that!!

Why would they even want to call me their mother to friends, family….I sure as hell don’t blame them. I can’t even stand me…how could I ever think anyone else could?

I have nothing to my name, materialistic-wise, I am broke, divorced, and a meth head. Real proud of their mama…fucking NOT!!

And I am supposed to be their example in life. Wow, talked about feeling like a complete and total failure/loser/let down.





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