Trying to work and maintain a job while using meth isn’t easy. I sit at a computer 7+ hours a day with my back towards 8 other people in my department. As I sit there my brain is racing from using, my leg constantly wants to shake, my eyes glaze over every so often from being so high that I can’t even see the computer screen a foot away, and all I can think about is how many more seconds/minutes/HOURS until I can get home and bang another rig of meth?
I am also positive one or more of my co-workers is watching me. They’re watching me because they know I’m high. I am also convinced several times throughout my workdays that co-workers are whispering about me. I sit there EVERY day, trying not to look like the meth head that I am and every 5 or 10 minutes I’ll whip around in my chair, convinced I’ll catch whoever is staring at me or whispering about me behind my back. How messed up is it that I spend 70% of my day trying to catch people who most likely aren’t even looking/whispering or even care about what I may or may not be doing????
Our department supervisor has an office in front of all our cubicles. Whenever a co-worker happens to go in to talk to her, I am once again convinced it’s to tell her that I’m using drugs and she needs to send me for a drug test.